Sunday, August 30, 2009

Crucial Conversations

A student of mine was not too happy with the job and place of posting. It was always an eerie feeling with the person that life was not on the right track. This was shared with me and my help was sought. The short conversation went on as penned here.

Student: Sir, is the right time to talk to you? Are you free?
Teacher: I am at work. Obviously how can I be free? I am supposed to be busy. Jokes apart, go on.
Student: Sir, I am terribly frustrated with my job and this god forsaken place. I need your advice as to what to do?
Teacher: What are your issues? What is affecting you? Can you share?
Student: My work is not interesting, and nothing much to do after work. I feel like quitting my job and running back to Mumbai.
Teacher: I understand what you are saying. But do you think quitting is the only option?
Student: I know Sir what you are saying. At times, I just break down. But you know I am a fighter, and I won’t quit so easily.
Teacher: Then what are the options before you? Will breaking down now help?
Student: No Sir. I need to make things interesting and enjoy my work and stay.
Teacher: What can you do to change the situation? Can you think of some alternatives?
Student: Seek interesting work, discuss with my boss, join a gym or yoga. At least I have a well paying job
Teacher: You need to settle with the present. Many a time, we don’t realize what we possess. Wisdom is all about enjoying the present and creating possibilities for the future.
Student: But the negative thoughts keep coming back
Teacher: Let me tell you what you focus on expands. If you focus on ‘ job is not good’, this thought will expand and cover your universe. Then you breakdown because you attract negatives.
Student: Yes Sir, got it. I will look at it in a new way now.
Teacher: What should you be doing?
Student: I am confused. I think I need to deal with them, what else? Yes, I need to own it
Teacher: You are on target. Think on how to confront issues that crop up and come out with solutions. Anybody can crib. Very few can resolve and settle with issues as a part of life. Now it is your choice of ‘whom to be’.
Student: I am accountable Sir, its my life. I know what you say is always for my good and that is why I discuss things with you. I know you will tell me what I need to hear and not want I want to hear. Thanks, Sir.

People’s performance will always correlate with how situations occur to them. Until the occurring shifts, a new future cannot be established.


Greener Bangalore said...

Very well said sir!!!

Kavi said...

Settling with the past is important to deal not only with present but also of the future !

No wonder, you enjoy all the popularity that you do enjoy sir !


Babli said...

Thanks for your lovely comment.
I liked your post very much. Very beautifully presented. I appreciate for your wonderful writing. I fully agree with you and I always believe that if we think about our past then we can do much better in whatever work we perform at present and can do our best in future also.

Neha said...

that was a wonderful post sir...really enjoyed reading it...thank you for gonna be very helpful...

Believe and Achieve :)

Yadayada said...

law of attraction...
nicely done...

nsiyer said...

Thanks Greener Bangalore.

Am I popular, Kavi? You mean to say I play to the gallery? Thanks, Kavi.

Thanks Babli. Its inspiring.

Thanks Neha. I have seen it happen in my own lif. It's truly experiential.

Newton has sai.d it. Presently, the book Secret says it. Thanks Yada yada

syed ahamed saqi said...

very well said. Its very easy to crib, as its easy to find fault in others than in ourselves.

adversity brings in extra-ordinary performances.

Sucharita Sarkar said...

Many of us do not count our blessings and always think that the grass is greener on the other side.

But I loved the way the teacher (You) made the student discover the right approach by analysing himself, instead of just offering advice.

Vivek Patwardhan said...

"what you focus on expands" very insightful, I will remember it.

Great post,


DebraLSchubert said...

Thanks once again for your deep insights. Your posts inspire.;-)

DebraLSchubert said...

BTW: I linked you on my blog.;-)

nsiyer said...

Thanks Saqi. I am touched.

Thanks Sucharita.very true. We don't count our blessings.

Parwardhan Sir. Your appreciation is more than enough. I am humbled. Thanks to you, Sir.

nsiyer said...

Thanks Debrah for the appreciation. And thanks indeed for adding my blog as a link. I am honoured and yet at the same time hubmled. A great writer like you.

Eskimo Bob said...

Sorry I don't stop by as often - I haven't been around the bloggy block for awhile.

Glad you're holding things together.

You're my portal into India as I'm yours into Alaska.

Lilly said...

"what you focus on expands" oh I love this so. Thanks for the inspiration.

sujata said...

That was an excellent teaching..

Deepika said...

That was a very inspiring post sir...Changing one's perspective difinitely helps. Taking ur suggestion, I have also made my blog public, wud keep updating it: Pls visit and give ur feedback :

Sushree said...

It goes without saying sir that your words of wisdom are truly inspiring - but I sometimes feel, words just do not get you out of that rut; pardon me sir but it all sounds rhetoric at times :) only the person going through it knows the hell!