Friday, October 24, 2008

Missing you dad

The first post on this blog is in the fond memory of my dear father who passed away on 17th April,2007.


The musings of writing have often visited me but today it was irresistible. I needed to pen my feelings and out from the gut these flow. Looking back, life has been wonderful and the many people I have met have made it wonderful. The most wonderful people - my parents.


My father, a very loving soul, who lived by what he believed was right, and often he was right. A man who was sought by many for his counsel, advice and blessings. Continued to live life till his very last on his own terms, and steadfastly by his own convictions and principles. Ever ready to sacrifice his comforts which he always did and which came very naturally to him . A 'Gandhian' to the core that after his retirement in 1974 from then 'ESSO' and now 'HP' always sported a khadi jabba and dhoti. Had barely any wants for himself but would shower whatever he had on his wife and two sons and all those who visited him. Whatever may be the hour of the day, all who came home were cheerfully welcomed and fed to their heart's content. Unconditional love was his hall mark.


His day started wishing everyone good morning and addressing his wife' Aho Bhagya vathi Naari". They doted on each other for sixty four years till he bid her good bye when he was eighty eight. Imagine togetherness for sixty four years - an extremely loving couple who complimented each other in all respects. My mother, of course, was the erstwhile 'Bhartiya Naari' who never crossed the 'Lakshman Rekha' she had drawn for herself. Probably, seen in today's context, this was the reason that they unflinchingly besot each other for sixty four long years.


After retirement from HP in 1974 after 35 long years of service, he earned pension for another equal number of years as his service. So loyal was he to HP, that he insisted that my brother and I fill up petrol only from HP petrol pumps. He helped my mother in her household chores after retirement right from cutting vegetables to meticulously ensuring good 5 S at home. He maintained a personal diary which apart from mentioning incidents and people, also contained the daily expenditure of the household. There was never any day when his expenditure did not contain cash given to people who visited him and sought his blessings. He truly was born only to give.


So much has been his influence on all of us that his presence is always felt. He looks at me from his Heavenly Abode as I write this blog and whispers to me ' Go to bed, my son, its getting very late'.


I know he is always there for me , but I will always miss him.

67 comments:

Kavi said...

Fantastic and touching post bringing about both the simplicity of the man and the mark that he left on you and the family !!

I am sure he speaks through you and the keyboard !

Congratulations on the first post. Keep it going. And take it much higher !!

Vivek Patwardhan said...

Welcome to this new star on Blogosphere!

nsiyer said...

Thanks Kavi for the first comment on my blog and the nice sentiments expressed therein. I shall keep it going.

Thanks Patwardhan Saab for your comments, and the advice you tendered to make the blog going.

neha said...

Dear Sir,

I actually felt as if I am reading about my grandfather!

I know its truly a blessing to be surrounded by such simple, humble and unconditionally loving people!

Indeed I am fortunate to have been born in this family.

Sir, you are always welcome to come and meet my grandparents!! They will love to meet you too!!

nsiyer said...

Thanks, Neha. I will definitely meet your grand parents and seek their blessings.

Viswanath said...

This is Vichu from Sydney.

Good one my friend.

Whenever I think of your Dad; I remember him standing next to your mother in the kitchen. They used to talk to each other as though they were recently married. I have seen this a number of times at your place and I used to smile listening to them.

I remember visiting your house when we were studying for SSC. You had stepped out. While I was waiting for you; we kept talking and he told me "HARD WORK WITH DEDICATION WILL ALWAYS PAY". He told me all this while is talking to me of a village called Noorni in Kerala State. There was some much passion in what he said that it has been my memory for so many years.

I am sure you will be missing him. But he is always with you when you recollect the lovely moments you have spent with him. Remember; good things never die.

Keep writing and let the rest of the family and friends enjoy.

Vichu

S.Jayabalan said...

Thanks Mr Iyer. VADa Pav as well as about your Grand Parents. I on 1 st November became 4th time a grand father. You know Sreekanth my second son. He was blessed with a Son on st November. Sothe family tree keep growing. Hope the future generations also will value all the sentiments we share .

Sridhar said...

Ramani,
Words that bring mama alive. I have enduring images of him doing the Friday Puja, which later Murali used to do often.
I was most touched when both of you (Murali & You) recited the Sri Lakshmi Nrisimha Sthothram full throated on his 13th day.
I can never forget his smile, his gentle ways and his hospitality.
Your parents showed us what it means lead fulfilling life simplicity, dignity and kindness. You are all blessed and so are your friends.
Thanks for sharing this. You rewinded my clock 55 years!You surely know how to operate a time machine with words!
Sridhar

nsiyer said...

Dear Sridhar,

Thanks a lot for the post.
It is interesting to note my father's impact on a lot of people, especially those of you, who were associated with him since childhood.
Keep visiting my blog and enlighten with your comments.

nsiyer said...

Thanks. Mr. Jayabalan.Congrats! on becoming grand father for the fourth time. Convey my congrats! to Srikanth.

As long we walk the talk, our children will always value the sentiments we share.

lata said...

Fantastic!

Your dad (my dear Athimber) really made a mark on many lives. My memories of him go back to the days as a child, when we used to come to stay at your house in Paradise. The theme for the stay would be "enjoy". No restrictions, lot of good food, many people to talk to. My idea of Paradise will always be a house where the door used to be always open to guests, except during sleep time. During my college days, when I would come to stay there with Jyotsna, it truly felt like a resort. Early morning tea with biscuits and loads of other eatables which Athimber would coax us to eat. And then during the day, he would give us money to go and eat Pani puri at Gandhi Market. As I write this, his cheerful face, addressing Athai as you said, the jokes that he would crack, all come to my mind. All this fun, with someone who was so principled, disciplined - a perfect blend of values. As Appa used to say, he was a Pillar of strength for so many people. There are so many things to write about him. Yes, the pair Athai and Athimber, after so many years of marriage - they still looked newly wed. During Appa's rites, he made it a point to climb up 2 floors to the terrace to witness the homam on 3 days. Truly, as the priest commented, he was like Bheeshma Pitamah. The only regret I have is this: Like every year, he called me on 16th April 2007 to wish me on my wedding day and still blessed me for a child (This when almost everyone had given up on me). I had then smiled to myself thinking that I would very soon break the news to him. But I could not do that. Maybe he is seeing everything from wherever he is now.
Truly, a great soul.

lata said...

I shouldnt use confusing words, I guess. The Paradise house door, as I have seen always used to be open, which used to close only when everyone goes to sleep. But still open to guests. From the comment, it sounds like it becomes closed to guests when people are asleep. Never!

nsiyer said...

Thanks Lata.

Your words brought tears to my eyes.Your mother, my Lakshmi mami, broke the good news that you are expecting after the 13th day 'Gruha Shanti' was over since she thought that was the appropriate time to break the news. Do you know the immediate thought that passed my mind?
Yes, dad is going to be reborn

Lots of love,
Ramani Athan

TC GIRIVASAN said...

Mr.Iyet

Your first post was poignant. You have reciprocated well by dedicating your first post to your father.

I am sure his blessings would take you iyer and higher.

We had a brief association. I see some of your father's qualiies in you - caring, loving, gentle and soft.

I remeber you whenever I see Kamalahasan in "Vettayadu Vilayadu",

Best of luck

TC GIRIVASAN

Anirudha Deshmukh said...

I meet your dad everytime I look at your phone or sometimes on your laptop. And mostly whenever I interact with you!

Its so good to see you on the blogsphere. And I am sure you will be touching a lot of people, just like you do in the everyday life.

Here's raising a big toast to you ...

Ani

nsiyer said...

Thanks, Ani for those inspiring words. Even more for raisng a big toast.
I shall continue to touch people in my own way, as you have stated, everyday.
A request - kindly visit my blog as and when you get time and post your comments.
Thanks, again.

RAJENDRA said...

Dear Sir

I could very much see your father through your words in the first post. What a great man who made an impact directly and indirectly through his sons. My sincere thanks to him for giving a fantastic coach to us. Keep it going and take it higher.

Jayaram said...

Great writings Subba. I loved it

Jayaram

Dwarak said...

Exceedingly lucid and vivid. The dedication to your father is rather very moving. Excellent work. Pl. keep it going! I shall peep into your blog often and comment, if neeed be.
I invite you to visit my blog http://sarukkai.blogspot.com. Pl do offer your comments!
DWARAKANATH/ 13.11.2008: 4.45 pm

NSL said...

Hello Brother,
I did not know you had so much in you. That certainly describes our dear father in full.

His values , we will be lucky, if only we can emulate even a part of it. He was a great soul. Even to this day, I stare at the empty chair at the Dining table in front of the entry door to the house, half hearing his "Raja Vandhachu, Avanukku Horlicks Kudungo", however late in the night may it be. His insistence that he would have dinner only with me, whatever unearthly hour may it be, always gave me the feeling of being on the top of the world. Now dear mother continues to live by the same norms. For me that was and continues to be the ultimate happiness in life. Our father lived his life on his own principled terms, and even died on his own terms. An epitome of self sacrifice; I learnt from him how little one really requires in life to be truly happy. I pray to Lord Lakshmi Narasimha to give us strength to lead the life by the path shown by him. Today, when his life ambition of seeing a Doctor in our family has materialised, he is no more with us to bless and guide us. Those are the uncertainties of this world, I suppose.
I am sure he is watching us all from his heavenly abode, and showering us with the chicest of blessings. We salute him with all reverence. .
Murali & Sita

nsiyer said...

Thanks, Dwarakanathan Sir for the encouraging comments.
I shall look at your blog and definitely post my comments.

nsiyer said...

Thanks, Jayaram for the nice comments.
Keep reading my blog.

nsiyer said...

Dear Murali and Seeta,
Thanks a lot for all that you have written. Your comments are really touching and many of the things written brought to memories my own experiences whenever he stayed at Paradise.
Yes! he will always be there for us, and with the Almighty Lakshmi Narasimha's Swamy's blessings, we should happily sailon doing our little bit for one and all.
Yours,
Ramani

Shashank said...

Hi Dad,

It brought tears to my eyes when i read what you had written and more so when i read perepa's(nsl) comments. My grandfather was the epitome of honesty, truthfulness, conviction, dedication and devotion. I will always miss him. He was the pillar of strength for our family. I know he will be showering us with all his blessings till date. The values he taught all of us will be passed on for generations dad. The unconditional love he had for his wife is an example for all of us. Live life simple and for others was his belief. Even though we, the younger generation many a times think that we are a step ahead, we cannot deny the fact that the very step was placed by someone who loved us so much. I thank you for the values u have taught me. THATHA as i used to call him will always remain in ours hearts forever and we will miss his overwhelming and comforting presence till eternity.

seerat said...

makes me miss my daddy and i do agree things parents do our very close to our hearts even if we voice them or not..but its nice to tell them sometimes as it makes them feel special..
very sweet poem uncle its just about little things in life which are so simple yet touch your heart...
im sure ure daddy is always watching over you and the family :-))

Nisha said...

Uncle,

A Very touching post. I can relate it to what my dad says..

Iam sure ur dad is very pleased by you and must be smiling from the heaven..

Keep it going uncle.will like to read more posts of yours.

Nisha
(shashank's friend)

Imran said...

Sir,

It has been said that whoever is compassionate, defines the culture. Perhaps that’s why people are looking for new stories, stories where the response is not violence, retaliation, and war, stories where basic human rights are not violated. Everyone believes that human beings can make better choices through inspirational writing.
Yes, your writing has inspired me!

And will continue to be profound when ever someone reads it. The values of grandfather can easily be seen in Shashank.
Touching elders' feet is the first lesson in manners and etiquette that my grandfather had taught me. I may not be able to do that at the moment but will definitely ask to seek blessings from a man who loves his parents.

Shashanks friend

deanna said...

Dear Iyer
Touched by the words you expressed towards your dad. He was and will always be a source of inspiration to you and your family. I had met him only once and always heard about his good deeds and thoughts for the family from his daughter in law Seema who was very fond of him and she did her best inculcating the good values from him. His unconditional love and presence will be a miss but I am sure his prayers and blessings shall always shower on the entire family and will lift you higher!

Sunshine said...

Dear Iyer,
Read both the posts.
The first one is a wonderful ode from as doting son to a father who no doubt has left such a wonderful imprint on not just you but through you on the many lives which have been touched.

The second post on the much loved Vada pav weaves together many issues nicely and at the same time reminds us of the much loved all time snack for so many of us.

A great beginning . Looking forward to seeing more great stuff on this blog.

Atul Sethi

nsiyer said...

Dear Shash,
Your comments were overwhelming and written with a lot of passion and feelings. I would also like to thank Imran, Serat, Nisha for their comments.Pl. convey my thanks to them.
Love,
Pappa

nsiyer said...

Dear Atul,

Thanks a million! I visited your blog and it reflects the total 'you'.
I will keep visitng the blog and enjoy myself.
Thanks.
Iyer

Thanks Deanna,
Absolutely nice to see your comments on my dad. You know he means so much to me.
Thanks from Iyer

Tanya McGinnity said...

Hi Iyer,

Thank you so much for sharing this with me! It is an inspiration - I have often wanted to keep a blog - now I definitely will!

The one about your father was just beautiful!

'Worry looks around,
Sorry looks back, Faith looks up.'

kirtidilip said...

Hi Subba,
great to visit your blog - its feels like Dilip and I are with you

Loved your musings about your Dad- I recall meeting him just a couple of times but still he left his influence.

keep flying higher- will visit often

Kittu

nsiyer said...

Thanks Tanya. Keep visiting my blog and post your comments.

Thanks Kirti and Dilip.I enoyed your comments.
You both are always with me. Such things don't change.
Love.

Meenakshi Das said...

Hi Sir,

The blog is really touching and in some way or the other it reminds me of how our parents make sacrifices in order to provide the best thing available to us without thinking twice!

I would like to take this opportunity to say; how your name comes so easy to my mind when I think of asking for any kind of guidance and help,now iam not surpised where your helping nature comes from?!, its genetic!:)...Your father is living through you!....
Meenakshi Das
Tiss,HRM &LR

Meenakshi Das said...

Hi Sir,

The blog is really touching and in some way or the other it reminds me of how our parents make sacrifices in order to provide the best thing available to us without thinking twice!

I would like to take this opportunity to say; how your name comes so easy to my mind when I think of asking for any kind of guidance and help,now iam not surpised where your helping nature comes from?!, its genetic!:)...Your father is living through you!....
Meenakshi Das
Tiss,HRM &LR

nsiyer said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
nsiyer said...

The above comment has ben sent by Vijaya Mami from US.

Anonymous said...

RECEIVED COMMENTS ON E MAIL FROM VIDHYA MAMI FROM USA

Dear Ramani,

Good day. We are all fine here.We are having fun with our pethi Rinnah. She talks a lot.R,L,SK & jayashree are doing fine. 

 We visited ur blog  and went through your wonderful article about ur father/ our dear mama. it was quite interesting & we love to have some more of this kind.

 The Source of Inspiration to one and all and a guide to all of you in your upliftment has left you  to fend your way in future years, keeping in mind your dad as a role model.  With his immeasurable love and affection we are sure that your dear father will surely guide you from his abode above with the Lord.

  We always remember him. He was a friend ,Philosopher & guide to us . He has planted in the young sublime ideals of conduct by the radiant example of his own life. Whenever I was talking to him I felt as if I was talking to my father.He was our well wisher.

It is still very fresh in my mind that whenever I took Ram & Lakshman to school ,he used to watch me whether I was safely taking them down { especially during rainy season }& he used to wave through the window. His blessings are always there for us. 

  
   with love & blessings,
       vidhya mami

Pradnya said...

Dear Sir,
Beauty is not the word that flows in your writing....Its just..have no words to describe it...Sir I feel the best achievement in our life is the beauty of relations...Very touched after reading it..

Santosh said...

Dear Ramani Anna,

Exceptional blogging, thanks for starting this.

Your opening remarks remind me of the critically acclaimed American Fiction writer E.L. Doctorow who has said - '" Planning to write is not writing. Outlining...researching.. talking to people about what you're doing, none of that is writing. Writing is writing"

'Block Mama' as we all affectionately knew him right from childhood has been a tremendous source of strength and inspiration to our family. We are all missing him very much, feels like a big vaccuum now which can be partially filled only by the fond memories we have of him. Almost impossible for someone to emulate him and be such a great role model.

Not only have I known him thru' the personal interactions and by watching him in person but also heard great things and those little stories of him thru' my grandmother Chellammapatti (who was his elder sister). They both shared a unique bond and many times made me think that if husband-wife role models are Ram-Sita then brother-sister role models are 'Akka-Kondhai'.

Be it stories of his mischievous childhood in Thillamalai where he always took the different and more difficult detour on his way to school or almost everyday when he broke the slate and hung it around his neck on his way back from school, Mama was indeed 'unique' . His physical and mental strength & valor in swimming the seas in choppy waters on Adi Amavsaya day says a lot about him being courage personified. Lord Lakshmi Narasimhaswamy was pratyaksham for him and the Lords grace and sahayam has indeed been bestowed on all of us thru' Block Mama.

Mama also held the highest values and principles and abided by them . He always wanted all of us to excel in whatever we do and give it our best shot. (no excuses if you don't get 100 out of 100 in maths) .

He has indeed sacrificed a lot for all of us and our family. This space is too small to list them, need to come out with a book to write all of that. Can only mentally remember everything he has done for us and prostrate before him.

Mama - wherever you are now, pls accept my humble namaskarams and bless us always. And do convey my namaskarams to Chellammapatti also. We miss you a lot.

Regards,
Santosh

nsiyer said...

Thanks Santosh. It has been extremely well expressed, and thanks for bringing my 'Bhuta Niwas Amma' and your 'Chellamma Paati' alive through your posting. Yes, the 'Akka- Kondai'combination was exceptional and a rarity -'the epitome of brother- sisterhood'. Chellamma Paati was a personification of calm and composure, and who was held in high esteem by one and all in our family. Both of them together showed all of us the way to live powerfully. We owe them a lot and your Mama confessed that he would never cross the line laid down by her for him and the family. Great souls - both of them.

My sincere namaskarams to Chellamma Paati and Mama, and with their blessings - we will continue to live happily.

Ramani

Mohan Prasad said...

WORDS OF SOME KEEP THEIR MEMORY ALIVE

I recall with fond memories your beloved father.

Those were the days when I used to come home to fill in the journal of our field visits!!

Our journal writing use to start as usual late in the night after a series of “exchange of MILS Masalas ” about all and sundry .

I remember his coming over near our table, in his inimitable style of a gentle gait; making customary enquiries sans any gossips (in spite we belonged to the known league of families in the small south Indian hamlet in the city of ‘Sion–Matunga combine’.

His patented style of sporting the ‘dhoti’ a trifle higher to the normal waist line is so vivid in my mind.

Yes, he will unfailingly come to the room again at/around mid night to enquire “how long you need to work, don’t you want to retire and sleep?”

That was the level of his fatherly concern about us. A few words, yet it had such depth and love.

Subba , I remember that day as if it just happened just recently.

We had just earned our fist assignment post MLS and were exchanging notes with him with those typical ones like “we do not have much of work to do…..etc etc ”

I also remember his response in a gentle and yet in an impactful advisory tone .

“Remembers you are not hired for doing the job, rather for thinking on how the job needs to be done and getting it done”.

Well, Subba , even today it rings bell so candid and clear .

He said it years back and we realize it almost on every occasion even today. I keep mentioning this quite often to my juniors and they think I must be quoting from some ‘management guru’.

Yes, I owe this to your father; after all he occupies a position that precedes the ‘guru’ in the order of the scale of reverence and respect - “Pitha”.

You are lucky to be calling him “APPA”.

Words of some keep their memory alive.

Your beloved father will be fondly remembered by me as long …..

I close with salutations to the great soul; who continues to energize us in our journey

Mohan Prasad

nsiyer said...

Thanks, Mohan.
You again brought him alive for me. The advice that my father gave us is what we are supposedly doing and appraised on.Your depiction of how he wore his dhoti brings his picture to mind.
Thnaks a million!

Subba

N K said...

Dear Ramani,
"All grand thoughts come from the heart"goes a saying and ur blog on mama is testimony to that.I have fond memories of mama,a very religious person who would not miss his daily pooja come what may.Santosh,u were right,the Akkal-kondhai bonding was unique and i have yet to see something like that.According to mama,his sister(my grandmother)was a noble soul and they both would not take any decisions without consulting each other.One cannot think of mama without imagining the contribution of mami,a companion of 64 years and a source of strength to him through thick and thin.I have spent much time with them and admired their closeness.
I lost my dad in 2005.Itwas pouring heavily in Chennai that october and the roads were flooded and the city was virtually under water.Mama at 86accompanied by mami and Murali came that morning to meet my mom(his ponnu Marumal)and share her grief and console her.Only mama would do that.
He would endearngly call me Banamma and make me feel very special.
Ramani,thank u for allowing us to share our thoughts on mama.
Mama,we need ur Blessings all our life.
Bhanu

nsiyer said...

Dear Bhanu,

It is quite clear that these are the writings of a journalist. Well written and events very succintly and lucidly captured.
Mami was overwhelmed when I read out your post to her and she said ' aval aval thaan'. Yes, Ponnu Maramal, Bhanamma and Mapppilai Saar were special to him. Like Mamma used to say 'Nalla Chittai na Bhannamma/ Mapillai Saar thaan'.
Unfortunate that we do not have Bhuta Niwas Amma and him with us today - both noble and inspiring souls. Their thoughts and teachings will always guide our family, and bless us all.

Yes, we will always miss them.
Sri Lakshmi Narasimha Swami Sahayam.

Ramani.

nsiyer said...

Dear Bhanu,

How can I miss my favourite Athimber, who Mama used to affectionately refer to as 'Rajappa'? Mama and Athimber used to talk the whole night when they met. It reminds me of my unending talks with my dear Athimber during my Chennai visits.

All of them must be having a nice time out there, and reading our comments on the heavenly blog.

Ramani

anjali said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
anjali said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Amit said...

Hi NSI....this article is so simple yet so touchy.....Just like you...While I was reading it I felt you around talking to me in person....
Great going NSI...

LIC Ranga said...

My dear Subba,
Our friendship started with LIC as I was an agent. During the same time I met your family.

Your father was a great human being and personally to me and that too at the first sight. He never treated me like an agent. I was infact treated like a family member.He always used to bless me whenever I came. And he will be helping me from A to Z.

Your daddy and mummy, my beloved Mamma and Mami, received me all the time with a smile and never allowed me to go back without my stomach filled. In my life, I have never seen people like my Mama and Mami as to this date. His two sons, Murali and Ramani are also in the same mould.

If I miss a person in my 65 years, I miss my beloved Mamma in equal measure to my father and mother.

My uncle Naganath Mama wherever he is will guide us. My namaskarams to Mama. Always with his blesssings.

Ranga

Prem said...

well i can say i have taken some time in writn this comment however it was just that it was difficult for me to actually write about my grand dad in this space ..but this one is for my thatha...well cut to 17th april the most shocking moment of my life thatha my dad said had got a heart attack iwas like to shocked to react but was positive he will get thru bec will is sumthing he relied on always...to be frank it has still not a most defnite truth for me to this day...that when i come back home i wont see him around...that day i was in aurangabad trying my best to fulfil one of the biggest ambitions of mine but more so of my thatha to be the first doctor in my family...but i thought that day he could have been saved sumhow i should have been there here ..we should have acted quickly but then the great man had decided his time had come..he had suffered from myocardial infarction..and in the medical proffesion im in i hear this word very frequntly and it just keeeps reminding me of him...

Prem said...

...i had the biggest wishes of my life to see myself standing in front of him saying thatha there is the sthethoscope around me..im doc now..thatha hopefully i have put an important step forward in fulfilling ur dream..and i know for sure that smile on his face would be evident showing the great happiness he must be deriving even at this moment from wherever he is luking down upon me...its just tooo little to say ki i miss thatha u cant miss people who have had such a great influence in your life..because he lives on in us with the way we do things...his determination in life of which i hav heard a lot from my dad showed he was a man of steel...ready to take up any task and he cud do it...he has made it not only for himself not only for his near ones but even for those people who had actually cheated my great grandfather..here was a man who just didnt think of today but the big picture he told me..prem save for a better tomorrow and he was right always...we;ll to say i was ver close to him would be an understatement,trust me i was his favourite..as my dad tells me my birth had sprung the biggest celebration by him

Prem said...

he had always pinned his hopes on me..i remember him teaching me maths everyday..and bec of that i had become so perfect that i had goofed up on my exam timetable once studied social science when there was a maths exam and stilled scored full marks..that was the amount he had made me practice...we used to love seeing those cricket matches together and analysing those cricket matches together supporting and criticising sachin tendulkar together...i remember him every nite he used to cut the vegetables for the next day...and i used to tell thatha dont make this make sumthing else...well he used to give me full license... and i guess i could change wht he was making ...well thats the amount he was fond of me i think...i remember this one instant when i had told one of my friends to give a game for my birthday .. my dad came to know about it and scolded me...then i cried a lot and just lay in the arms of thatha...he asked what happened and he told the others u dare tell anything to my grandson...in those arms i felt like heaven his love his warmth...and yes i was a bit scared of his anger but then his anger is the one that has seeped into me too i think..he is more than my idol..the way he gave the best possible education to my dad..and beta..speaks volumes of his determination and dedication...everyday he used to wait for my dad,for dinner i dont remember a single instant when he has not waited for my dad..he used to day raja vandacha...avanka ada khudungo...i have never seen my dad crying in my life ever until the last day of my grandads last rites rituals i saw my dad cry i stood there cold there was a certain shock that my grandad is actually no more,...i still remember when my sister came after hearing about thathas death she was inconsable..i mean i t was just too much for us

Prem said...

he has been such an influence that,..i mean i miss him badly,..i remember going to eat panipuri in gandhi market with athai and priya without telling thatha but he knew about it all along...well in the year 1994 i had my thread ceremony and thatha had managed the entire ceremony alll by himself including inviting each and everyone all by himself and paati so much so was the happiness for him...then came shashanks thread ceremony yet again thatha in the forefront as it was held in the sacred place of tirupati, .

Prem said...

in the year 2000 beta and dad both ended up coming to mumbai so the entire family was together and that was special...and whenver all of us met we could see the twinkle in his eyes...

Prem said...

in the year 2003 in that fateful night of 30th september 2003 as i had secured admission for my mbbs i called up thatha i cud actually feel his happiness right eevn in the phone..and then the next morning i came home and the happiness i saw on his face was just something special unmatched i cant ever forget that moment..and in each of my mbbs years he used to sit with me ask me about what i was learning in college..wht were my plans for the future such was his passion about that profession as if it were his own..he had asked me to show the photos of each of my friends and he knew them personally he used to ask me abt my room mate and i lot of things

Prem said...

..i remember in feb 2007 he had come to a'bd for the first and unfortunately the last time..to see my hostel my hospital my friendz..he saw every ward of my hospital..he was living his dream through me..but it was his dream..

Prem said...

in 2001 i remember patti and mummy had gone out for some function..and thata was cooking rice and i was in the kitchen too but then suddenly the lid opened up and the hot rice and the water fell on me..that day thatha was so worried but thankfully nothn much happened it was a minor burn..i can easily say thata was more worried abt it than me..

Prem said...

cut to 2005 when the natkat i am iwas removing something from the top shelf and trying to do that i hit my head on the moving fan and the fan stopped it had cut opened my head a bit i went to the doctor immediately without tellin thata ofcourse it was a minor cut and did not require a stitch..but by the time i came back home thata already knew about i t and gave me a solid firing on my carelessness which was more out of worry than of anger

Prem said...

..then in 2001 again i remember dad was suffering from malaria and at the same time seema aunty was also suffering from malaria so he was pretty down ...for the first time he had seen his son in such bad health and then at the same time seema aunty being sick too was a double blow

Prem said...

then ofcourse in 2004 when mom was hospitalised for a condtion intussception...which was earlier diagnosed as a lump...the day there was the test for its malignancy i could see the worry on his face and he was really scared i think and then when the test was not a positive for malignancy he was surely relieved

Prem said...

....well i remember that whenever i used to do namaskaram the ashirwadam thatha used to give was become the best doctor in this world
...i call him thatha..dad calls him anna...and beta calls him mama...but N.S.Naganath is the true legend which will live on ...
He was known by many a name
His determination was his claim to fame
Never did he look for recognition
A total mixture of dreams and ambition
A true believer in god
A younger brother who believed his elder sister to be his mother
An elder brother who very responsible as no one other
A loving husband for his wife he was her life
For his sons he was a true idol
For his grandchildren an absolute legend
For me he will always leave behind a lasting impression
For i remember him every moment with a smile and a tear for my true source of inspiration
Naganath Narasimhan Prem thatah i will miss u always but i know u will be there for me forever

Prem said...

beta i cannot forget the days after my final yr mbbs results i was frustrated had lost self belief..and even cried luking at thathas photo many a time but then..he brought me out of it too he was the source of inspiration...i had 2 do it for him i had to..and the day my results came i was crying in front of his photo yet again with mixed feelings for me becuming a doctor but at the same time thatha was absent in person....

Anand said...

Dear Ramanianna,

It is wonderful & deeply touching to read such a beautiful blog on your Dad, my Dear Periappa, followed by so many comments from friends, neighbors and relatives who have met him, and been showered by his love, warmth and care.

When I was reading the blog and the comments that followed, it brought tears to my eyes and along with that, the memories of those 20 odd years, when he and Periamma took care of me and nurtured me, the “Porakadha Pullai”, as they used to lovingly call me. He was so many things to so many people, a doting husband to a loving wife, a loving brother to his siblings, a caring father & a guide to his children, a adoring grandfather to his grandchildren, a patriach to the extended family, who always had everyone’s best interest in his mind and a pillar of strength, compassion, love and wisdom to anyone who sought his counsel.

“Manliness without Ostentation I learnt from what I heard and remember of my father”, writes Marcus Aurelius in his book “Meditations” and this is how I will always remember Periappa too and hope that I would someday be able to come somewhere close to the high standards that he has set.

Anonymous said...

I am touched!!!!!

SUNDER IYER said...

Lot has been said over in all the beautiful comments by each person who came in contact with a great soul who has left a significant mark in each one of our lives.
I have been trying to pen what I feel about Periappa and I always fell short of words to describe this man who led his life the way to which each of us should look upon and try to follow his foot step to make our lives beautiful.

Being an introvert myself I never used to interact so much with people around and therefore could not get much close to this great person though I knew he had all love for me. I repent now on missing those lovely movements. Being a silent observer I always used to admire the impeccable qualities of this great person and always desire if I could become one like him at any stage of my life.
The values he has instilled in the house is reflected in the upcoming of Murali Anna & Ramani Anna and to an extent can be seen in each one who came in contact with Periappa.
Prem in his comment has put his soul in lovely words and when I write this space I have tears rolling down my eyes by just imagining how happy periappa would have felt if he was here to see that there is a doctor in the family and his grandson has fulfilled his dreams.
The memories we carry of him would always help us in creating a beautiful picture of our own lives and the principles laid down by him would always help us to navigate successfully through the challenges of life.
In loving memory of Periappa we all love.
Sunder & Kirthika